Thursday, April 06, 2006

You are dearly missed


Hwa Chong, you are dearly missed.
College life, you are dearly missed.
Mountain loads of homework, you are dearly missed.
Stress, you are dearly missed too.
Suddenly I miss the uniform times. The time when I was always occupied with schoolwork. The time when there're always endless number of lectures and tutorials for me to attend.
Looking back, I really wonder why I never really bothered to treasure the time in class. never really utilised the time to do proper work, like listening to the tutors/lecturers or doing tutorials. Thinking back, the knowledge imparted seemed so interesting to me. Why didn't I bother to grasp them all? Why did I let go of the chance to absorb more knowledge time and again?
Still remember in J1 I wrote a question in the class diary which is lost already, 'why do we have to come to school.' Remembered Choon Siang was the only one who replied, 'to gain more knowledge'.
At that time somehow I couldn't understand why is there a need to know more.
Now I can do. Ever so clearly. Not for future, not for money, not for better paying jobs. But simply, for interest sake. Well, I can never relive my hwachong days again. Opportunities are not there forever.
Recently I dreamed that I was a Sec 1 girl in SCGS again. Not as a 13 year old girl, but as the person whom I am in reality. A girl approaching 20 years old. Some of my friends and I went back to sec 1 again so that we can re-read what we have missed. The other 13 year-olds stared at us, puzzled.
I didn't understand why I had that dream then.
Now I do. For the sentiment I am experiencing now.
In Sec 2, we were given the title 'The Days in Blue Pinafore' for Chinese Essay Writing Competition.
I didn't know what to write and how to write then.
Now I do.
I never really thought anyone would miss those horrible school days. I told myself in mid J2 that I die die would never want to restart my JC life again.
Now I do.

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