Tuesday, August 01, 2006

Endless Search

This is a endless frantic search for friends.
People make time out especially to look for new friends.
They don't have time for their old friends, their old friends have no time for them as well.
When they found a group of new friends who belong to the same category, they have two routes now.
1. Stick with this group and ignore the rest of the world.
2. Keep them as reserves while continuing to look for friends of different types.
Some people choose path 2, in the end they have no time for both new and old friends. So their new and old friends, if they are a little bit more reserved, would stop looking for new friends, and end up being friend-less.
Everyone's constantly looking for friends, to form cliques, to lose and find friends. Everyone's thirsty, everyone's desperate, everyone's empty inside. They need a group of friends to feel that sense of belonging, to the university, to the hall, to the school, to the nation.
Everyone forgets that they have an everlasting companion called self. Or sometimes, they didn't forget, but they choose not to depend on that friend. Cuz it doesn't give them the sense of belonging to the nation, school, hall, university. Yes it does give them the sense of belonging to their own selves, but they are not satisfied with just this little tiny world. They want more.
So they tried to ignore the lonely self, and satisfy their external cravings for friends, for laughter, for popularity, for that sense of belonging to the outer world.
Their hearts are always empty, their older friends are always abandoned. May be they are not. May be they will try to ring these old friends up once in awhile, when their newer friends aren't available at the moment. Older friends are always there as reserves, to company their lonely selves when their outer world is empty. Old friends are there to tend to their lonely souls, counsel them, cheer them up.
But old friends aren't gonna be there for long. Once their outer world is filled, they will be so full that they have no space available for their old friends. So they lose contact with their old friends once again, all the way till their outer world got poorer and poorer, and they make way again for their old friends.
New friends will soon become old friends,
and the cycle repeats itself,
and their souls remain empty still.


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